Living Well

Girl trip anyone? My friends' trip was not born of grade school, high school, or university reunions.  These women, authors in common, a nurse practitioner, photographer, and retreat coordinator met in our mountain community about eight years ago.  Their husbands or partner fostered their interests at home while these adventure-seeking dames explored Peru.   





Harsh mountain winters motivated other friends to rent a condo in Naples from their friends who took advantage of the real estate bust and upgraded their home. Joining them for our regularly scheduled Friday lunch with ten others, one friend laughingly admitted, "We did not miss you at all.  We had the best time in Hawaii for my birthday - the children surprised us with birthday decorations for our cruise cabin.  We had the best winter.   Turkey, more travel to my aunt's 95th birthday, then Hawaii."    How fortunate for this couple (she traveled  to Turkey with her sisters).


"Live fully" is the signature with which a favorite relative closes her correspondence.   That can translate to knowing when it is time to sell the house and enjoy a retirement community.  With those with smaller pockets that might mean selling the one-bedroom condo on two floors and moving to a one-floor ranch within her price range and delight in a two-car garage to make winters more manageable.  Another with wanderlust and a fixed income lives with high cost of energy bills, caregiving, and maintaining a home that remains on the market in another state. An arm-chair traveler for now.  Romance was intimated by another answering a personal ad for a mountain gal.   Advice?  Don't sell the house.


What travel experience is on your bucket list, have you recently enjoyed, or remains in your memory?

Why I Love My Doctor- We're Not Dead Yet

When I retired, I moved back to the area where my children grew up so that I could be closer to my family. As such, I had to go through the motions of changing everything. I changed doctors, most notably. I spend about 3 to 5 hours a month at the doctor, which doesn't sound like a lot but it sure isn't a walk in the park. Since I'm there a lot for checkups and other tests, I need a doctor that I feel comfortable with and can trust. I made the mistake of hiring the first doctor that I found, and quickly realized that I needed a better solution. The mistake? Let me explain.


I had been spending the day with my daughter, who just insisted on riding along with me to my appointment. She likely wanted to see and hear for herself that I was (or was not, perhaps) healthy. So I conceded and she came along. Mind you, this was only the second time I had been to see this doctor. I could have been his mother, too. He was fresh out of medical school and you could tell. But that day, it was painfully obvious that he'd missed the course on bedside manner and patient communication.

He came into the room, talked to me, talked to my daughter, and went about his business. As the appointment went on, I began to notice that he spent far more time talking ABOUT me to my daughter, as if I wasn't even there. After about 20 minutes, I was exasperated. I looked him straight in the face, excused myself, and said

"I'm not dead yet, you know."

He got a startled look on his face, and chuckled, as if I was joking before walking out of the room. In the process of finding my current doctor, whom I love dearly, I went through about 5 or 6 who all did the same thing. I made it a pet project, of sorts, and took my daughter along just to prove a point: doctors tend to treat older people like children who can't understand them. We understand just fine. As a health advocate, I am advocating for better education on patient communication. We ARE the patients, after all.

Contributed by Mary Albert, a blogger for a senior lifestyle web site that provides advice for the 55+ age group as well as medical alert reviews

Coping with Sudden Change

Update on Sarah. Don't you love the crisis subject lines? OMG. We were supposed to share theatre with Sarah and her husband on Sunday, arrangements made less than a week ago. What happened? Sarah, 65, fell halfway down a staircase in the home she and her husband lived for nearly 30 years. Looking to the future when they might not be able to step over a tub, they remodeled a bathroom on the first floor to include a shower. How welcome that convenience will be once she returns from physical therapy.

Living two hours away I was unaware Sarah was using crutches for a knee problem as my quiet partner had not mentioned that after conversations with his brother. I can only assume Sarah was putting off knee replacement until the school program she retired from but still was involved with completed its academic year. And until she was there for her children or could attend a family celebration. We all know procrastination when it comes to personal challenges that requires recovery time and, heaven forbid, accepting help from others.


Then there is my friend Kathleen, a bubbly, savvy 65. Kathleen is about to marry her Internet sweetheart. The duo have biked from GA to the NC mountains more than once and are planning more trips with biker friends. Recovering from minor surgery she is planning her backyard wedding while treating emergency hospital visits for her sweetheart as blips on the screen.

Why play it safe when hit with health challenges? One can moan or take the high road...or lower road as my friends Gary and Sally have done going South for three weeks to enjoy easier climes and celebrate lifelong friendships. Two surgeries for him, breast cancer surgery for her were met head on, dodging bullets finding laughter and always moving the best medicine. Who are your heroes that keep on truckin' no matter what?